Beginnings and Endings

Ecclesiastes 7:8 (The Message)
The Message (MSG)
Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson

8 Endings are better than beginnings.
Sticking to it is better than standing out.

I read this verse this morning and it said something to me! It's always easy to start something but harder to finish. Isn't that true?

January 1st is full of good intentions as we sprint out of the gate with our eyes on the finish line, but staying the course is harder and by August it would be rare, I think, for many to still be in the race. We are, and I know it's because of our mutual support.

I had a busy week last week and didn't post my weight. It was 151.2, and today I weighed 151.4.
I'm feeling like I want to renew my focus on my goal, put my head down, and go for it.

My goals are:
Exercise at least three times a week for an hour of walking.
Indoor exercises with weights at least 4 times a week--arms and legs.
Lose the final 7 pounds.
Get at least 6 hours sleep a night, but mostly 7 (I'm not kidding, this would be a big improvement :) )

I've made a new Excel schedule and it looks like a place of safety and health for me because I've scheduled in rest as well as activity.

Here's to a wonderful and healthy fall. I know it's not here quite yet and I'm not rushing summer; but I'm gearing up for the next step.

Maintaining

Hi All,

I continue to weigh 150 lbs. at home and 145 lbs. at the cottage- a descrepancy between scales. I have been doing interval training 3 times a week for the past two weeks. Out for a brisk walk for 50 min. with a minimal of 12 minutes jogging during that time.

Maintaining is all I can do right now it seems. The stress is high with a hospital trip by ambulance for one of the twins, Jason being sick for 6 days (he is finally beginning to get well), transitioning from the house to the cottage and back every week-end, and beginning schooling and planning for the next school year. I am content with what I am doing right now because it is all I can do. I am aware that things will slow down by the end of the month and even calamities end in their season.

I have found I have been struggling with my self control with both carbs. and sweets and it seems to happen when I'm under stress- go figure.

Thinking of all of you battling the same fight. We'll cheer on as we get healthy together.

Belinda, it has been great to hear about your new walking lifestyle.

Shan, I often wonder what it's like on the west coast and think of you hiking, biking, or kayaking. Way to go with increasing the activity.

Susan, How's it going with the new plan?

Just checking in. From the lightbulb.

Strong Arms in the Making

Psalm 144:1 (New International Version)
Of David.
1 Praise be to the LORD my Rock,
who trains my hands for war,
my fingers for battle.

I have always loved this verse from psalm 144. I find it inspirational and the image I get is of good strength.

This week I weigh 151.4, but this journey is becoming less and less about numbers and more about a healthy lifestyle all around.

I'm loving my walks with Molson; sometimes chasing grandchildren on bikes at a jog-walk. It's happening about 5 nights a week and I can see that I'm trimmer for it.

This weekend I pulled out my old Weight Watchers pamphlets and reread some of them. There are a couple with exercises to tone the arms and legs. On Sunday I started with the arms. Tomorrow I'll start with the leg exercises and add these 15 minute workouts on alternate days.

I can FEEL the muscles under my skin responding and coming to life--being stimulated. It's a good feeling.

Checking In

Photo by Katherine Burston

Hey, to the growing crowd of friends; mighty slide stoppers all!

I weighed in yesterday at 151.6; the same as the week before and I confess I would have loved to report a loss. However, I think it's healthier not to focus as much as I do on the actual weight, and instead focus on the actual eating.

I have not binged once, this past week. I credit the fact that I have focused on maximizing protein and minimizing carbs, for that.

I haven't done this rigidly, but just kept it in my head as a general rule. When eating a carb, I am aware of what it might do to my system, so I don't have a lot.

I have been packing my 6 brazil nuts for an afternoon snack faithfully. They help curb cravings and fill the tummy.

On Saturday, when 4 of our grandchildren were over and one of them wanted me to play soccer, I found that I was able to give him a run for his money. I may be bringing up the rear, but at least I wasn't dying with exhaustion.

I'll keep posting my weekly weight, because it helps me to do that, but not with any obsessive focus. I hope this encourages my Lightbulb friend, who is doing so well to have survived 4 weeks at the cottage in such fine form and who must be amazingly fit after all that exercise.

LIGHTS ARE ON AND I"M HOME AGAIN

Although absent in words, my thoughts have been right here with you all as I made choices at the cottage for the past 4 weeks. On the cottage scales (yes there were two, our calm and careful family broke one), I weighed 145 lbs. Hooray for me.

The down side is, now home, my house scale has me at 150 lbs. I'm not sure which is right although I know which I'd rather believe.

I walked on average of 4 times a week for 6.5 km (jogging for 12 min. of every 50 min. jaunt. I jumped on the trampoline, paddled a canoe, rode my bike, swam and was generally active. Although I had treats, I carefully applied my 'no carbs after 1:00 p.m.' rule, breaking it rarely.

I felt great and when I measured at home, I was pleased to note I had lost 1/4 inch off my arms, 1/2 inch off my legs and 5/8 off my tummy.

In spite of this, I struggle with attitude towards my weight and was surprised by it. When I thought I was 145 lbs., I was jubilant and feeling great about my weight, size, and choices while away. When I got home and the scale read 5 lbs. heavier on the same day, I was discouraged, no longer felt good about what I thought I'd achieved.

That's why Shan's last post spoke so powerfully to me. Attitude is important and weight is influenced by so many factors.
As well, I was encouraged by Susan's early success and Belinda's vigilance in steady life-style changes.

You all are definitely a blessing in this journey and as Belinda said, "Comrades in Arms." When I begun, I'd never have believed this weight-loss adventure would have been such a battle.

It is such a discovery of self for me.

Thanks to have me be a part. It means a lot.

You - The Owner's Manual

We were having lunch, Belinda and I, just before I left on two weeks of vacation. She was showing me a book she'd just bought. It was called, "You - The Owner's Manual". I was intrigued and as I was flipping through the pages, she said, "It's on page 363".

I flipped to it and there is was. "The Owner's Manual Diet".

"Turn the page" she said. I did. There it was. On one page. All laid out for me. It was "The Owner's Manual Diet - Crib Sheet."

I read some of it out loud. Partway through I looked up. "I think I can do this!" I said.

And you know what? I can.

Before lunch was over, Belinda was making a gift of the book to me - to take on vacation. To get started on "the new healthier me".

I've been reading the book all right. I read the crib sheet to Ron on the way to Windsor. I read it to him again on the way back. Though I need it more than he does, we both decided to take its advice to heart.

There are only ten or eleven principles, and they are very easy to follow. Even while on vacation. In the interests of not violating copyright I won't write them all out here, but I will be mentionin them in future posts.

It's been three days now, and I'm doin' it! I feel like I'm doing my body a favour. I don't feel one bit deprived.

I would recommend the book to anyone. It's not just the chapter on weight control that is good. Today we read all about the brain and how to minimize the natural decline of memory - like taking good care of your arteries so they keep doing their job in getting oxygen and nutrients where they need to go. It's a book that is factual and enlightening, and both encourages and empowers you to take better care of yourself without being judgmental about what you haven't done so far.

Long Time No Post

I've been meaning to get in touch for ages but life is getting in the way. I can barely keep my personal blog afloat, but want to check in here with you.

I am was down to 180, making my total weight loss 12 pounds. I've just hopped on the scale after that last sentence, and now I'm up again to 184. This is because my family is visiting, I haven't been on a bike in almost two weeks, and the celebration food is flowing.

Interestingly, I feel healthier than I have for a long time, despite this upward trend. Why? Because we're spending nearly every day outside from dawn to dusk, canoeing, swimming, walking, playing. So my fitness is down (must be), and my eating is up (can't help it) and I still feel better. I think this says a lot about the measuring stick we use for "health". There are so many factors involved, and it's so dangerous to focus on the weight alone.

BUT, that being said, I have complete confidence in my ability to lose the weight again after this halcyon month is over. I will start today, in fact - though this weekend will be a total loss because we are going camping and neither death nor hell nor things that creep below nor things that fly above will keep me from marshmallows and hot dogs.

* * *

I've been thinking lately about happiness and how it contributes to my health. I am not a small woman - never really have been, aside from two brief years as an anorexic. And do you know what? Those two brief years were miserable. Horrible. Frantically unhappy.

My mental state, with regard to my weight and size, could be described as "slightly uneasy". I'm not overly worried about the extra pounds, though when I see pictures of myself I am always surprised. "Is that what I LOOK like?!" Because what I FEEL like is so different.

An interesting thing happened a few weeks ago. There was a year-end hafla (belly dance party) for my troupe, at my teacher's house. I was so excited about it, and got dressed in my most colourful costume. Bought a new lipstick and everything. While I was there helping my teacher set up and decorate, she told me about plans she is making to put on a belly dance show in February at a local theatre. It was a very big moment for me when she asked me if I would dance a solo in the show. A real, paid, for-money, BUY TICKETS show.

I said yes, of course I would! I would start work on a choreograph and a costume and be ready for February! It would be great! I was so excited!

After everyone arrived, some girls took pictures, and showed them to me on the spot. I glanced at the first one and was shocked - I felt deflated and worried. I felt like I looked silly and fat, instead of powerful and beautiful. But I smiled and agreed when everyone said enthusiastically, "Great picture!" Because that IS what I look like - and my friends think I'm beautiful. And my teacher wants me to dance a solo.

When I was 20 years old, in my third year at UVic, my rowing coach called me into her office and told me that I had made the team after two months of tryouts. I wasn't the tallest, the fittest, or the most talented, but she told me that, during those endless hours doing time trials on the ergometers, I had shown something else: "Mental Toughness". I'll never forget what it was like to hear that from a woman I admired - a member of Canada's National Women's Rowing Team - a woman who was, to say the least, NOT lavish with praise. I stored it away and have pulled it out since, playing it for myself whenever I feel I'm floundering.

At the hafla, I used that Mental Toughness again. I used it to put aside my feelings of inadequacy (overadequacy?) and discouragement, and to straighten my spine and put a smile on my face even though I was still dressed in that flamboyant costume when I suddenly wished I had worn something more concealing - even though I was tempted to look around at the other, smaller girls and think anxious thoughts about the difference between them and me.

I'll lose more weight - I'm not concerned about that. What I AM concerned about is my attitude. I am making daily efforts to change how I feel about myself: not to be ashamed and worried, not to hide under big clothes and dark colours, but to race powerfully through the life God gave me with the muscles He granted me, the strength He placed in my arms, and the charisma He wanted me to have - no matter what size I am. My belly dance teacher said, when I confessed to her (for the first time in three years of lessons) that I feel fat, "There's an inner beauty and strength that shines through, Shannon, and you have so much of that. Your body size is not what people notice first, or even second."


I didn't mean to write so much today. I was just going to give an update on the weight situation - that was all. I guess once I got going I realised I had a lot to get off my chest, after all.

Belinda, I'm so glad you are finding a difference with judicious administration of protein.
: )
My mom always (and rightly) harps on the importance of protein and always reminds me "it's the building blocks of cells. The more you exercise the more you need to build your cells."

Fox, I hope you are well and happy.

As for me, I will be getting back on track next week, when I wave a very sad goodbye to my sister Amy and my brother Mark, and my nieces. I will watch them down the street, then I'll go get my bike and do a hard 90 minutes with the pedals, to get myself going again.

Good luck everyone....carry on!